When Stuff Happens!
Domestic Violence and some or all of its horrible manifestations, along with the mess it causes, will likely visit a pastor and the local church…and it will have to be faced. Sadly, Domestic Violence is only too common in the life of the modern church, for the church is a microcosm of the society in which we live.
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), over 10,000,000 people a year are physically abused by an intimate partner. 20% of women have been raped, 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner, and 1 in 15 children are exposed to intimate partner violence each year, 90% of which are eyewitness to this violence. Finally, 1 in 3 women and 1 in 5 men experience sexual victimization other than rape at some point in their lives.
The results of violence are devastating to say the least, creating symptoms which may include:
- Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
- Severe anxiety and or depression
- Greater incidents of drug and alcohol abuse
- Difficulty in developing healthy intimate relationships, and so much more.
Very few Christian leaders are equipped to help when the crisis of abuse is exposed in church life. Remember, DV happens with good Christian people as well…somehow we must address this ever-increasing problem.
Deacon Wilson has a Secret
The Wilson’s were considered a stellar example of Christian life and leadership. They had a successful business, were regular tithers, and George was a member of the leadership board of the church…but they had a secret. What finally came out was that George had been stealing into his middle daughters’ bedroom for the past 4 years, and molesting her at least three times per week. The mom suspected, but being fully dependent on him she was frightened to confront the situation. When her daughter threatened to tell her school, mom finally acted. She called the pastor, and presented the news; the next call came to me…what was the pastor to do?
When crisis comes, help is needed now! In this brief video to follow, I discuss a simple but effective method for helping in a crisis. I hope you will take time to watch it. Remember, we also have a special offer coming to you after our 3rd video. It will give you the opportunity to become an effective care giver to those caught in the crisis of DV. Please enjoy our 2 free gifts just for watching.
Dr Stan DeKoven is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Drug and Alcohol Counselor, and Certified Domestic Violence Counselor living and serving in Southern California. He is also the founder and President of Vision International University, and has written over 50 books in counseling, practical theology and leadership, including the bestselling Patterns of Destruction: Counseling for Domestic Violence, and Crisis Counseling.
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