I Want to Be Like You Dad Part II
Who Am I?
I am what I eat, or my life is my physical existence, and the length of my life and the health of my existence is most important. Thus, I am what I feel, how I look, or how I compare to others in my sphere of influence.
Others, especially men (though this is changing some) will state, “I am what I do.” Their work or especially their title determines their relative worth. This distortion of true identity is not just seen in secular circles, but in the image enhancement demonstrated by local pastors who exhibit 9 or more letters after their names (B.A., M.A., Ph.D., etc.). Education is an important ingredient for successful ministry, but it should not be the primary basis of self-esteem.
Related to education as image enhancement is, “I am of worth because of who I know, where I live, how much money I have, etc.” All of these identity enhancers, if portrayed as a primary statement of worth, are fleeting at best. Yet, they are quite commonly the “masks” worn by many.
Finally, and this is especially true for men and women raised in dysfunctional homes, “I am” what has been spoken over me from times past. These “prophetic” words make up the “compensations” for the true identity which Christ will form in us and are the focus of this book. Our identity, or our core self-concept is primarily formed by age 8-10 years. If one has been told that they are ugly, stupid, inferior, whether in word or deed (or both), over a period of time, by a significant other (usually a parent and especially a father), that label becomes indelibly etched into consciousness. Essentially these negative prophecies when embraced distort the Godly self-image causing permanent, if not irreparable damage. These images are reinforced through chosen (whether unconsciously or consciously) adult relationships, and patterns (especially co-dependent or dependent) develop.
Any one of the “I am’s” covered here will leave a hole in the soul that needs filling with something. The attempt to meet deeply felt and legitimate needs through self-medication, compulsive behavior, or passive avoidance will never work, but may give temporary relief from shame based (I am worthless, I will never make it) identity. The church must be prepared to minister to the core identity of God’s people, and bring more than symptomatic relief. The heart cry is for actual restoration of the heart or core of the person.
What is My Purpose?
Productive and purposeful activity is one of the essential elements of a happy and well adjusted life. Somewhat related to one’s identity, or an extension of it, is a person’s unique purpose. “What is my life all about and what am I here for?” These are not merely adolescent questions, but questions of the aged as well.
Purpose is related to vocation. In secular terms, our vocation is that which will provide for necessary status, esteem, comfort, and security. As such, the greater one’s status, education, vocation, the greater their worth in this world. The Church of Jesus Christ has a distinctly different perspective.
Essentially, to the committed Christian, vocation means servant hood to Christ and His Body. A Christian’s avocation is that which we do to pay our bills. Within that purpose, the highest calling would therefore be that of five-fold ministry, or to other service (Elder/Deacon) in the local assembly. The church has strayed far from these lofty goals to accommodate the world’s perspective of worth.
